Not a teenager anymore

Well as of 1:03 AM yesterday morning, I am no longer a teenager. Thats right ladies and gents, I am officially 20.

Yeah, so I went to church yesterday, and my mom and I went to a little coffee shop while my siblings and my cousin were in Sunday school. And we were joined by my aunt, my cousin and my uncle [my aunt's sister, not her husband]. My uncle who had actually forgotten that it was my birthday felt inclined to give me some advice. (Believe it or not, he has never had children before):

"Well since you're 20 now, you aren't a little girl anymore. You are turning into a young lady. And from what I've heard, young ladies are supposed to be smarter than little girls."

And I am not exaggerating, this is almost exactly what he said. Very profound words. I feel so much more mature after hearing his insightful wisdom.

I So Hate Consequences

Relient K - I So Hate Consequences

And I'm good, good, good to go
I got to get away
Get away from all of my mistakes

So here I sit looking at the traffic lights
The red extinguishes the hope the green ignites
I want to run away I want to ditch my life
'Cause all of my mistakes keep me awake at night

And after all of my alibis desert me
I just want to get by
I don't want nothing to hurt me
I had no idea where my head was at
But if my heart says I'm sorry can we leave it at that
Because I just want for all of this to end

And I so hate consequences
And running from you is what is my best defense is
consequences
Oh God, don't make me face up to this
And I so hate consequences
And running from you is what my best defense is
'Cause I know that I let you down
And I don't want to deal with that

It just hit me this is more then just a set back
And when you spelled it out, well, I guess I didn't get that
And every trace of momentum is gone
And this isn't turning out the way I want

And after all of my alibis desert me
I just want to get by
I don't want nothing to hurt me
I had no idea where my head was at
But if my heart says I'm sorry can we leave it at that
Because I just want for all of this to end

And I spent all last night
Tearing down
Every stoplight
And stop sign in this town
Now I think there might
Be no way to stop me now
I'll get away despite
The fact I'm so weighed down

All of my escapes have been exhausted
I thought I had a way but then I lost it
And my resistance was once much stronger
And I know I can't go on like this much longer

When I got tired of running from you
I stopped right there to catch my beath
There your words they caught my ears
You said 'I miss you son. Come home'
And my sins, they watched me leave
And in my heart I so believed
The love you felt for me was mine
The love I'd wished for all the this time
And when the doors were closed
I heard no I told you so's
I said the words I knew you knew
Oh God, oh God I needed you
God all this time I needed you, I needed you

Water Buffalo (et. al.)!

I love Veggie Tales! So for your viewing pleasure:

Craziness

Isn't the time preceding finals just wonderful?? Haha. Sureeeee. I have been running around like a chicken with it's head cut off this past week. And no doubt it won't end until finals are done and over with.

But the good thing about this craziness is seeing thing after thing just be done and over with. Like my lab practical. Which is basically just answering a bunch of questions about different labs I had. Boy did I have a headache afterwards, trying to remember everything I needed to know. Luckily, my professor gave us 5 extra credit points such as 'Who is the author of The Hobbit?' or 'What was one of the words on the web of Charlotte's Web?' So I think I got at least 5/50 right =)

So, my advice for what to do during this busy time comes from Dori, from Finding Nemo

'Just keep swimming, just keep swimming, swimming, swimming!

My life is boring, lol.

But I turn 20 on Mother's Day! So thats exciting.

Phillipians 4:6

Phillipians 4:6 "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God."

I miss dating. Like a lot. I need to learn to be patient and realize that God's time doesn't always coincide with mine and He believe it or not, knows what He's doing, lol. And learn to trust Him more. I always want to run out and do it the way I think it should be done, and it usually doesn't turn out so great...

I've done some reading, and praying, and God has put a lot of things on my heart. One really really good book I read that helped me a lot was the sequel to I Kissed Dating Goodbye, it was called Boy Meets Girl: Say Hello to Courtship (both by Joshua Harris).

I quoted Phillipians 4:6 because it's something I really, really need to work on. One of my greatest fears is missing the right guy and going through life alone. I have to work on my patience a lot. I know that God knows who the right guy is for me, and will present him at the right time.

Genesis 2:18 - The LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him." Yeah, I definitely need to remember this. God created man and woman for a reason, and it's not like He wants me to be all alone for life.

Randomness

1) I am way too full. My medical microbiology lab today was a end of the year party. The official calorie count was 1,000,000. There were tons of hot dogs and hamburgers, about 4 batches of cookies, a cake, 2 batches of brownies, a few batches of cupcakes, at least 10 bags of chips, pretzels, hummus, lots of of dip (including crab), pasta salad, macaroni salad, potato salad, mini snickers, and what I brought: baby carrots with low fat dip. LoL.

2) Awards banuet was tonight for APO. w00t. There were such prestigious awards as 'Willy Wonka Look Alike,' 'Most Destructive Brother,' 'Golddigger,' 'Most Likely To Rule the World,' 'M.I.A.' and 'Secret Lovers.' But wow. I won the Life Member award. How cool is that? I mean not nearly as great as the 'Most Destructive Brother Award'...but a nice consolation. Anyways, this brother won it for [accidentally] sending a wheelchair straight into a wall. Wish I could have seen it.

3) Dr. Margulies STILL hasn't graded my last exam. I am going crazy here. I'm one of those people who likes to know exactly what the highest grade is that I can get in the class.

4) Dunkin' Donut's coffee is heavenly! I went tonight to get a cup after the awards because it was held in Scarborough, and so it was so close. It is just as good as Starbucks, but way cheaper. That makes me very happy.

5) iTunes is really annoying me right now. The music store won't work for me, I am getting fed up. I keep on getting closer and closer to getting it to work, and then poof! Rien, nada, nothing. What a cruel joke.

6) I had no idea that people can tell that I was a dancer just by my feet. I was at praise and prayer night, and one person asked me if I danced, and she said it was because of the fact I stand with my feet turned out. Lol. When she first said it was b/c of my feet, I thought she meant all the scars I have on my feet from toe shoes.

7) Am I the only one who thought that President Logan was going to kill himself on '24'???? I was starting to feel bad for him, but now I really dislike him even more. And it looks like Jack and Audrey are going to get back together. Awwwwwwwwwwh. How cute.

And Keifer Sutherland is HOT.

The End.

Alpha Phi Omega

Wow, if anyone told me a couple years ago that I would be in a fraternity, I would have not believed them even for a second! Entering my freshman year, I was definitely very anti-greek, because I just assumed all of these organizations revolved around drinking and partying. But last year, a girl from my sign language class told me about APO, a co-ed fraternity that focused on service. And the rest is history! It's just really cool to be in this organization, b/c I get to do all kinds of community service activities, and make new friends too! And it's so cool because it was founded by the Boy Scouts, and has a focus on serving God. So thats just cool.

Anyways, my point in this rant was inductions were tonight. There was another one last week, but I missed it. So even though there weren't nearly as many people there as usual, it was still cool.

my cup is broken, yet it still runs over

Ok, so the Shane & Shane/ Bethany Dillon concert I went to was sooo awesome! The presence of God was so strong there, it was amazing! Not to mention they are so talented!!

God has really been showing me a lot lately. Things have been rough and I hit rock bottom this semester, but it is just so indescrible to know that I can fall down and He will pick me up and raise me higher than ever before. That He'll be with me, next to me, even when I can't feel him. I mean I have known that, but to experience it is so much different. And this whole weekend has been so amazing with God's love and presence. Because I know that there is so much I am lacking in, but I am so blessed. I felt God's love so strong and, yeah, it was just too good to be true. But that's God =)

I mean, a lot of things are still going on, a lot of mess. But God has taken all this and made so much out of it. Like my relationship with my mom is 34345562201 times better with my mom than it was even a few months ago. Also this one issue I have been dealing with for more than four years has been making me feel so horrible about a lot of things, but I recently had some very valuable conversations with some other christians struggling with the same things. It was SO awesome to know I'm not alone.

And it's amazing to know how positively wonderful my friends are. There are some people who have stood by me and held me up even when I wanted them to let me fall. Also, I was really nervous going back to Cru after practically dropping off the face of the planet because I felt so bad about everything that had been going on. Which is so silly in retrospect, thinking that people are going to just abandon me, but reaching out to people is such a hard thing for me to do. It is so much easier for me to curl up in a shell and try and keep myself safe. It's something I really have to conciously work on.

Shane & Shane - I Miss You
put down your paper plate
come to the table made
deep blue china
found on the table by the wine
so fine

it brings out flavor
like You bring out color in life

oh, i miss You so
the feel of forever
oh, that taste i know
it hurts to remember
unfortunately high
ironically dissatisfied
i miss You
i miss You

oh, i miss You so
the feel of forever
oh, that taste i know
it hurts to remember

i had a fleeting thought this morning
and i mentioned you today
it breaks my heart just to know You in part
and not to be with You where You are

Yay for new blogs :-)

What do you get when you add one Megan plus one computer plus one annoying Medical Microbiology quiz due by 10 AM on Sunday morning and stir well? A new blog of course!! I discovered this site and was like, hmmmmmm, this is another reason to spend even MORE time at my computer.

P.S. I realized I never said what the picture was of. It's a picture of what an antibody looks like. Woohoo for our body's natural defenses. If only the mechanism for how the immune system works wasn't so complicated!!